Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Mama bear courage.


Hello there! It's been a while since I gave an update on our little family. Thought you might want to hear how we all are!

This summer has been a joy for us. We are completely busy, but that is alright. Busyness helps me appreciate the still & calm moments. Most of you probably already know this, but we are expecting baby #2. Due in January and kickin' like crazy.  Am I nervous? Yes. Excited? YES! Nathan is very excited for this new little life. Claire? I don't think she has a clue about what's coming. I know she is going to make the most darling big sister though! So this summer has been FULL of midwife visits and pediatrician visits and all the other things that come to you when you start having children.

Claire is such a dear. She has been walking for a couple of weeks now, and it is an adventure! We can barely believe that she just wanders around our house all day on her own two feet! My baby is no longer a babe. She is growing up. I shed quite a few tears because of this, but then I was finished and no more tears thus far. I am very excited for her. I know that she is so proud of herself. You can see it on her face when we walk around the garden looking for strawberries and tomatoes. She is a wonder. I am so thankful that she is mine.

All this new progress for Claire has brought me to grow as a mother as well. You get so comfortable with your child being one way, and then all of the sudden they are on their way to new and better things. I still remember watching her as a newborn just laying on our bed in the afternoon light playing with her little hands. Then there are more moments..and more..and they just don't stop. Being a mother is easy and challenging. It is easy because you look at your child one time and then you want to give them the world. It is challenging because you are continually growing in your mothering. You make new feats every single day.

Today was one of those days. I have been suffering from pregnancy insomnia over the past few weeks. Never in my life have I had trouble sleeping at night, so this is quite a new thing for me. I am tired during the days because of it. Bless my husband for buying me a mattress topper for our anniversary! It has helped me much. Last night I was up a bit though. This morning when I woke I had the horrible, 'today is going to be bad because you are so tired!' mantra going through my head. I had to go grocery shopping. Now, grocery shopping with just Claire and I, is the most intimidating thing in world for me. She is in a stage of being an explosive wild cannon when we are in the middle of a store. Sometimes she stays in the cart, sometimes she wants out, sometimes she cries because you won't let her play with the desks in office max. You get the picture. I said a quiet prayer, and I decided before I stepped out of bed that we would go shopping together. I threw all caution to the wind and made us some oatmeal with plums, then we threw on some clothes and buckled our shoes and we were out the door. Sometimes if I think about it too much, I will stop myself from doing something just because I don't want to deal with a crying toddler. Today was about growth though, and how will we learn to deal if we never face our fears?

The peach was on her best behavior the entire time. I was stunned as we made our way through costco. She sat up front as my co-pilot most of the time, sucking on her fingers and cuddling her silky, pointing when she saw the ginormous teddy bears. Then she graduated to the main part of the cart when she saw we were getting bananas. She spent the rest of the time snacking on bananas and pieces of bread. We completed our entire route without a tear shed from either mama or baby.

Mamas have courage. A lot of it.

We even made it home in time for a nap.

-a.



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merci.