glass.

The past few weeks have been quite hectic. Nathan and I traveled over to Monmouth to do a house show with our friend Jen. The show was a dream. House shows usually are though. It went much better than I could have ever anticipated, minus the sound system cutting in and out. The house was warm and full. Just like our hearts. The day before Nathan and I were able to take Claire the peach on her first trip to IKEA. She loved it of course. We picked up a nice Brimnes bed frame. Probably one of the reasons I haven't been writing lately, is because our house was completely torn up because of said bed frame. It is just now being reassembled. We were able to visit a long time friend of mine and her husband. I've only ever met Kaisha once in my life and I had never met her husband, so it was an adventure to stay the night at their house and then have a little tour of freezing cold Portland together. We enjoyed a nice breakfast at Fuel on Alberta Street. Banana chocolate chip pancakes? Um...forever yes. Then we drove up to Washington Park. Gorgeous. I had never been to a park in Portland before. I really do love parks, so it was a treat for me. We walked around snapping photos and chatting. It was a wonderful time together. I think Nathan and I may have started another bosom friendship. 

Home now. I have been having a rather hard time being home during the day. Claire and I feel so cooped up because of the rain..there is only so much you can do in a one bedroom house. We are both starting to feel the tension. We are so used to walking around town poking in different antique stores. Not in the rain though. Hopefully it will let up tomorrow and we can go for a short walk. If not, we will be inside reading Winnie the Pooh. Tut tut..looks like rain.

The Lord has been showing me how I have been selfish. After having Claire it was hard to think about myself at all...newborns really do take a lot of time, and I was enjoying giving all that time to her. Lately, the Lord has been calling me out on some selfish things. Maybe it is because she is getting older, and it is getting somewhat easier to care for her, but I find that in all my free time my thinking always goes to myself. I am glad that Lord has brought this up, because frankly I really hate the feeling that creeps inside when everything is mememememe. It isn't peaceful, or lovely, or enjoyable. Today when I was staring at myself in the mirror I looked over at my daughter who was eyeing me, and I thought, 'o my gosh. What am I doing?'. I don't want my daughter to know me as a woman who scrutinizes herself in the mirror. The one who is worried about the jeans that don't fit right, the hair that is too thin, and the shoulders that aren't the nicest. That is not the woman I want my daughter to be. Our children are going to grow up and imitate us. I want my baby to see me doing lovely things like  making our house beautiful. Creating things for her to play with. Writing verses of encouragement on our walls. Going on walks. Exploring. Making. Breathing. Living. but not wishing she could be someone else. Mothers, your daughters will become you. Fathers, your sons will become you. 

Don't waste your time starring into the glass.

'Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates. ' -proverbs 31:30,31

How will you love your daughters and sons? 

love,

-a.

*photo from an ikea trip a few years ago. 

strawberry cake.

Before Nathan left for school this morning, he set up the recording gear for me. I made a little music, didn't get very far without him though. Sometimes I think I have the whole music thing figured out, and then I am reminded that I need my husband. He is a part of the music I write.  I love him.

After finishing up a small song, I decided I needed to make a cake. Something with strawberry icing. I am pretty darn excited to eat this cake that is in my oven. I am making a cake in my crappy oven. This is cool. Also, I feel very wife like at the moment. Listening to Christmas music in my polka dot apron. Fun.

The sky is gorgeous. Blue with those fluffy white tuff clouds. The ones that look like bunny tails. Leaves are ALL over our backyard. I love it.

I love life. This morning Nathan read his Steve Jobs biography and I read Shakespeare. It was a delicious morning.

I am learning particularly a lot about loving my husband and being patient with him. I am also learning how to be patient with myself. God is so good. I keep writing this, and then I ask myself, 'really? is He?'. I always retort back with a excited 'YES'. Too many wonderful things are going on for me to say no. Life is more beautiful every single day.
I love living.

I'll post some pictures of my cake when it is all done.
ria.

sheets

Nathan has a Calculus midterm today. Midterms are always hard...for everyone. I feel for him. I am so thankful that my babes is going to school for us. He is a special friend to me. He ate cheerios with honey this morning while I made him two sandwiches. I made white bread the other day. It turned out quite good. Not exactly like my mother's though. I miss my mother's cooking. Her soups especially...the beef stew. So good. And her pies. I want her pie so bad. I just can't pull it off like she can. Mom, thanks for all the good food over the years.
After Nathan left I made myself a cup of 'bluebird' tea with honey. Downloaded a bunch of free music. Got some ideas for christmas gifts. Thinking about a christmas album. Little drummer boy running through my head. It smelled like christmas this morning..like wood burning fires..I think it was just the homeless man in the alley smoking though. We have a holly tree down our alley. I think I'm going to cut some of it and put it in our little bud vases. Our gerber daisies are molding anyway. This will be the first Christmas I get to kiss my hubby.

I am more than just a little excited.

My plants are growing wild. One is trying to die, but I keep telling it to make it. I'd be too sad if he died. One of my succulents has tripled in height...I wonder if this is normal. I think he wants to be planted in a bigger pot or something.

Today is change the sheets day. This is what I want for Christmas. Nice sheets. We didn't get any for our wedding, and although I am very thankful for the purple floret ones that a nice old lady gave us, I still want some crisp new sheets. Every time I go to Target I wish they would be on sale, but they are always $50+ . Why does life have to be so expensive sometimes?
That reminds me. Rent is due.
God has been so gracious to us. My new job is just now starting, and still we are able to pay our rent. Things haven't been that tight. I am so thankful. My husband is a hard working man. <3 I love him.

Enjoy your day. I will.
Loves.
ria.

Depth of heart.

this was taken by my sister Mandy.

I am trying to decide which part of the house I should tackle next. I've been under the weather this week. Cold and all. I finally cleaned up the kitchen. My love dove has been trying to keep it clean, he has been doing such a wonderful job, but he has a lot of homework and work to do, so I made myself clean it this morning. He is away teaching Spanish right now, so it should be a nice surprise for him when he comes home. I think I will tackle the living room next. The floor is a smattering of Persian rug, minty gum, and thank you notes that I have been working on. I hand cut, hand drew them all. We are going to watercolor them next. I am pretty excited about these cute little postcards.

I laid in bed all morning yesterday. I felt awful. Listened to sermons while Nat was at school. God and I had a good talk yesterday. I have been feeling disconnected. All of these spiritual things going on, all of these bills that need to be payed, all these people who need to be pleased. I had a heart full of thankfulness though. All of these pressing matters didn't seem like that big of a deal anymore. That is what happens when you are in the presence of God. Everything just kind of fades off into a depth of field...just like a photograph. If you lack depth in a photo, then it isn't as riveting or heart stopping. Nothing is really exciting about it if you can't feel what is going on in the picture. My sister has been taking these really inspiring photos. Just of flowers, but if you really look at the picture, it comes to life, and for just one second, nothing else matters. God is like that in our lives. He just stops everything, and we can enjoy Him, despite what we are going through, who is discouraging us, and what we have failed at. He is very very good. All the time.

Lots of new ideas have been making their way into this mind of mine. I am going to see what I can do about them.
In the meantime, make sure you take your multi-vitamins and kiss your husbands.
Much love...
ria.